Take a Shower
🚿Seriously... it helps
I’m Tawny, author of Dry Humping: A Guide to Dating, Relating, and Hooking Up Without the Booze, co-host of the Recovery Rocks podcast, and co-founder of the vinegar-based botanical beverage, (parentheses)
I’m a woman in long-term recovery. This means I prioritize, observe, and work on my mental health daily. And it’s exhausting. Sometimes, working on my mental health means going to therapy or crying or doing yoga or screaming into a pillow or turning off my phone or setting boundaries or going to the gym or deleting the Instagram app… again. Other times, it means taking a shower.
One time, when I was feeling particularly low, I texted my good friend and artistic genius, Katie Mack. “I can’t stop these intrusive thoughts from racing around my head. I just want them to stop. What do you do when this happens?” I asked, assuming she’d tell me to journal or call her or exercise. “Take a shower. Yes, seriously,” she typed. Huh. I was stunned. There’s no way something so simple can be so effective. Occam’s Razor, yo.
I often feel like I need to read more books or listen to more podcasts or subscribe to more newsletters. Knowledge is power, yes, but intellectualizing daily life isn’t always the answer. Sometimes we just need to take a shower. Or go for a walk. Or eat a sandwich.
So, yesterday, after a long day of work and a long day of dealing with my mental health, I took a hot shower in the dark. I let the water beat against the knots in my neck while I took deep breaths. I allowed myself to cry, to really feel the moment. I had to fight my instinct to move on to the next thing, telling myself there’s nothing else I need to do and nowhere else I need to be. I need to be right here, bathing and breathing. This is “the work".” This is recovery. This is one day at a time.
👉How do you prioritize your mental health?
👉What “simple” practices keep you sane(ish)?
Upcoming Events
Boston - Join me on April 3rd at Dray Drinks for a live talk, book signing, and sample of my new drink. Sign-up info is coming next week.
NYC - I’m speaking at an event on April 20th. More info soon 😎
Virtual - I’m teaching a book proposal course on May 22nd. Sign up here.
Be kind to yourself,
Tawny
Yes!! Such a simple yet effective act. And, I relate so much to the constant “work” of tending to your mental health. I often tell people that I have to do 100 practices a day just to feel meh😂. But it’s way better than spiraling of going dark.
Oh cool- you’re coming to Boston. I’ve been wanting to check out Dray and this would be the perfect opportunity to snatch up some of your products too!
One thing that I learned to do (from my daughter’s therapist) when anxiety is revving up is to go for something extremely cold. My 10 year old has freak out moments during homework and when I see her beginning to spiral, I put an ice cube in her hand and tell her - take a 5 minute break and let it melt in your palm. It works! And I’ve done variations of this for me, too. Racing mind - I’ll throw a freezing cold ice cube on my neck and cold face cloth on my face (when I don’t have time to jump in shower).